In the last week, I have had four separate conversations about finding and making friends here in Alpena. Across ages and professions, these four individuals talked specifically about the opportunities — and lack thereof — to create friendships as they have entered or re-entered the community. One cited the difficulty of making new friends as an “outsider,” with invitations sent usually brushed off as “I’m too busy,” or “I have my set group of friends.” Another cited new professionals in the area had difficulty finding clubs or groups that offered casual ways to meet other people with similar interests. Another cited the lack of places to go where they may casually meet other people in their age bracket.

It’s not just Alpena. Across the country, Americans are lonelier and less connected than we ever have been.

In his seminal book “Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community,” Robert Putnam researches the trends, causes, and implications of this decline in social capital: the networks of relationships, both loose connections and deep friendships, among people who live and work in a particular society or place.

Both formal ways of involvement, like volunteering for local organizations or running for local office, and more informal ways of building social connections, like inviting people over to your house for dinner or joining a bowling league, have both dramatically declined since the 1970s. Across studies, demographics, income levels, and locations, the trends are the same. We have turned toward ourselves and our immediate families and away from our wider communities.

Putnam investigates the commonly blamed suspects, from changing gender dynamics to suburbanization to leisure time (we actually have more free time now more than ever), but none are the main culprit.

Putnam discovers this: “Nothing — not low education, not full-time work, not long commutes… not financial distress — is more broadly associated with civic disengagement and disconnection than on television for entertainment.”

In 1995, when his research was conducted, time diaries showed that family members spent three or four more times watching television than talking to each other, and six to seven times as much as spending in community activities outside the home. Surely this trend has only accelerated in the last thirty years with the endless smorgasbord of entertainment available on streaming platforms and the endless stream of content on social media.

Putnam hints that the passive activity of watching TV leeches into our lives in other ways. It is the only hobby that is negatively linked with having other hobbies. Collectively, American’s leisure time has been consumed by watching things (like watching sports) versus doing things (like playing a sport).

Building a more connected community isn’t as easy as turning the TV off. The infrastructure for creating social capital — from people’s willingness to expand their social circles to clubs that could foster this type of connection — has also been decimated as we have turned inward.

If you relocated to Alpena, where would you go to try to meet new friends? If you had a hobby, say running or skiing or crafting, would there be a club you could attend? Conversely, if you met someone new, would you take the time to invite them over for dinner and try to make a new friend?

In one of my conversations, the individual cited that “without quality housing or friends, many of our professionals that relocate to the area eventually leave.”

I was struck by this comment. In my field of work, we often talk about what it takes to grow the community and keep new residents here: high-paying jobs, housing, a variety of shopping and restaurants, and year-round events. “Making friends” has never been on the list. But perhaps it is time it is.

Beyond a sense of belonging, social connectedness has immense societal benefits. It can predict and enhance student achievement in school. It creates safe and productive neighborhoods. It can predict how long we will live. It can increase democratic participation and greater investment in the public good — if I am connected broadly with my neighbors and fellow citizens, I am more likely to support initiatives that benefit the public good versus only being concerned with me and my own.

What is the solution, then, with so much at stake? Putnam points us in two directions: We need to address the supply and demand for opportunities to grow our social connectedness. We need to create opportunities for people to connect: extracurricular activities for students, clubs for adults with similar interests, artistic programs for shared experiences, and public spaces where people can exist together. Equally importantly, individually and collectively, we need to realize the importance social connectedness holds and commit ourselves to building it in our own community.

Anne Gentry graduated from Brown University with a degree in comparative literature and has studied in Italy and South Australia. She is currently executive director of the Alpena Downtown Development Authority.