I understand just how weird it must sound, but my wife has adopted a squirrel in the neighborhood as a replacement pet.

It’s been a long time now since we had Chip, our one-of-a-kind cat. Instead, we now seek out “Stumpy,” the aforementioned squirrel. It shouldn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the origin of Stumpy’s name – he runs through the neighborhood with but the shortest of tails.

What is more interesting for me, however, is just trying to figure out how this squirrel ended up with such a short tail. Was it in a fight and it came up on the losing end, sacrificing its tail for freedom? Is it a genetic flaw that created such a short appendage?

Inquiring minds (as in my youngest granddaughter’s) want to know how Stumpy ended up in his current predicament. Stumpy hasn’t shed any light on the answer to that question, so Grandpa and Grandma just offer up possible scenarios as to what might have occurred to Stumpy, and the granddaughters can dream up their own stories.

And while I used the word “predicament” in the previous paragraph, perhaps to Stumpy, his tail is not a predicament at all. After all, he handles himself like any other squirrel in the neighborhood. He now has survived two winters since we first noticed him, and he seems to scurry up a tree with a speed similar to any other squirrel living around here.

Truth be told, this squirrel has the proverbial “nine lives” of a cat. In the autumn of 2023, our youngest granddaughter enjoyed spending a weekend with us, and of course, grandma had to get her to the pumpkin patch for photos and pumpkins.

After spending part of an afternoon carving and decorating some of the pumpkins, she helped Grandpa move them outside. It certainly was a “spook”tacular display.

That is, until Stumpy stumbled upon the scene. The next morning, we noticed one of the pumpkins seemed to have been moved a bit, and had what looked like little claw marks on the outside of it.

Later that day, upon returning from a playground outing, there was Stumpy sitting inside one of the pumpkins holding in his paws some pumpkin seeds that he was happily eating away at.

While Grandma and Abby delighted in the scene in front of them, Grandpa was seeing red and envisioning a bullseye target on Stumpy’s back.

The scene was repeated numerous times over the next few weeks. It was only by God’s grace (and my wife’s persuasive arguments) that the squirrel still roams the trees today. If I had my way, that squirrel would be hiding away nuts somewhere else today, and it wouldn’t be here on this block.

Speaking of nuts, remember when I said Stumpy has become a replacement pet? Who else do you know who would make a special effort to pick up shelled peanuts to put out in the yard for Stumpy and his friends?

And, I have to admit, my wife has got me paying attention to Stumpy as well. In fact it actually was me the other day who first noticed Stumpy out and about for the first time since winter set in several months ago.

Diane was delighted to know Stumpy had survived the cold months and the first thing she did – yep, you guessed it – was to scatter more peanuts.

You know life doesn’t always seem fair, and there are going to be trials and tribulations from time-to-time.

When that occurs, maybe there is a lesson to be learned from a small squirrel with an even smaller tail.

You know what they say, “When life deals you a lemon, use it to make lemonade.”

Or, in Stumpy’s case, go searching for another peanut.

Bill Speer retired in 2021 as the publisher and editor of The News. He can be reached at bspeer@thealpenanews.com.